Published on January 6, 2023

What I do

As a Counsellor and family consultant I offer compassionate, non-judgemental, and confidential assistance for individuals going through the divorce/separation process. Psychological support is essential to navigate the emotional turmoil that effects not only the way we understand and approach feelings and thoughts but also the outcome of the break-up. 

What I don’t do

I do not encourage or support blame. I do not discuss anything that is disclosed in the therapy space with solicitors, confidentiality is upheld, and boundaries are firmly promoted. I do not advise on legal matters. It is essential that your family consultant does not try and offer legal advice of any sort.

What qualifications, memberships, and experience to look for

It is vitally important that you seek a practitioner who is qualified and member of a governing body such as the NCS, BACP, BPS, FMC.

You are putting your state of mind into the hands of someone who has to be equipped to hold you in both emotional and psychological safety. The most essential aspect of this type of support is the therapeutic relationship, do you trust them? Can you challenge what is said without fear of rupturing the relationship?

Your chosen practitioner has to be qualified, an accredited member of a reputable governing body and insured but most importantly develops a relationship with you where you can safely divulge everything without fear of judgement.

Top tips for getting the most out of my profession

To prepare for your sessions it helps to keep a journal. When our minds are flooded with the chaos that divorce/separation brings, we often only remember events according to how we felt at the time; clouding our judgement and the way we think/talk about events later. 

Be prepared to explore your own role in what has taken place, this can be difficult when we are focused on who is wrong and who is right.

You can find family consultants and therapists on these pages.

If you might be interested in further reading, our shop contains books offering general guidance on family life at and during a divorce / separation.

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Co-operative Parenting

Co-operative parenting (sometimes shortened to co-parenting) is about sharing decisions and information about your children and making them feel as though they have two parents who can parent them effectively and together. It’s about communicating with your ex about your children in a positive and practical way.

Why Is Co-operative Parenting Important?

Much of the time, when going through a separation or divorce, parents will be experiencing emotional ups and downs. Such emotional turmoil can make it hard to step back and see things clearly. It can also be hard to see how we are going to need, now more than ever, to be calm and reassuring parents for the children. The benefits of co-operatvie parenting can last a life-time. Some parents can end up using children as bargaining collateral, withholding access, wanting to feel as though our children are on their 'side'. These can feel like small wins but really aren't and cause long term damage. On this hub you will find a number of articles offering support and advice on co-operative parenting. You will also find articles and videos looking at the longer-term impacts of separation and divorce.

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